PHOTOGRAPHS GONE WRONG

I am still learning how to navigate my new blog-page here at .net.   I am glad that I have Montana’s own computer-whisperer, Val, in my corner to iron out the bugs.  And there have been many.  Our latest fiasco involved the header picture up above.

When I decided to replace the last header (which was a photo of an upside-down “one way” sign), I submitted a photo of my parents, before they were married, out on a date.  This photo:

As you can see, they were either trying to impress each other . . . Or they were trying to impress the restaurant’s photographer.  (Mom assured me that you could see out of the little holes.)  I thought at first that Mom and Dad were wearing bottle caps, but saw no sign of beer.  My husband suggested that perhaps my dad carried a handful of bottled beer caps in his pocket.  I don’t know.  Maybe.  However, I still really don’t know what those things are.  My parents were in Izmir, Turkey, at the time, so the doo-dads they’d jammed into their eyes could have been anything from tiddly-winks to currency.

Then, once the picture had been posted as my blog header, I became more aware of the cigarette hanging from my dad’s face.  Unacceptable.  However, I no longer had my photoshop program.  So first I emailed and then called Val, the computer-whisperer, and his wife Sarah. 

“Please edit it out,” I begged.

“How about we photoshop a Snickers bar in it’s place?” Val suggested.  “Make it look like he’s eating a candy bar.”

“Good idea,” I said.

However, this was the end result:

Not quite the effect we were hoping for.

“Help, Val!” I called.  “It looks like my dad’s eating poop!  We need to change it!”

Poor Val had just spent two hours on his computer searching for a candy bar picture that he could substitute for the cigarette.  Apparently, it is very nearly impossible to find a picture of a candy bar set at just the right angle . . . or a candy bar with part of the wrapper still on it so that you know that it is, indeed, a candy bar and not something unspeakable.  Two hours of Val’s busy life wasted for nothing.  Poor Val.  But I hardened my heart, thinking that everyone who will see the blog will be far more disturbed at seeing doo-doo hanging out of my dad’s mouth than they would have a cigarette. 

“How about a head shot of Kippy, or Felix (their stuffed children – I mean, ‘animals’) looking into the frame like those old cartoons of Kilroy?” I suggested.

“Great idea,” Sarah enthused.  “I’ll just tell Val.”

An hour later, Val called back.  “You wouldn’t believe the trouble I had getting the picture put together,” he said.  “First, I couldn’t crop Kippy’s head from the photograph I was using without getting tufts of grass sticking out.  (Kippy was sitting in a field, contemplating his new pet)  Then I found this one where he’s feeding his pancake to a chipmunk –

-but I had to turn it around and put it at an angle when I inserted it into the photo to make it look like Kippy and your dad are having a staring contest.”

However, when my husband saw it, he was extra delighted with the result.

“It looks like Kippy’s braced his feet on your dad’s chin so he could pull his ‘scarf’ out of his mouth,” he said. 

Ahhhh . . . Val, cheer up.  It is finally over.  Good job!

Anyone out there have any photo disasters they want to tell us about?  We all have those pictures we want buried.  School photos where your blind grandma cut your hair the night before, perhaps?  Remember, to leave a comment, click on the ‘Comments’ tag at the end of this blog, and don’t forget to check out the latest Photoblog of disasterous pictures on the right!

‘And now for something completely different’ – click on this link below for your laugh of the day and watch with the sound up: http://www.thebigshow.com/video_day/videoNew.php?day=2010-08-17 

Have fun!

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47 Responses to PHOTOGRAPHS GONE WRONG

  1. Kippy says:

    Now everybody knows what I look like!

  2. Slarty says:

    Haha! When I first saw that picture this morning I thought Kippy was extending his foot to your dad’s nose like he was going to sniff it…and then I wondered how in the world Kippy was balancing on his tail like that. ;)

    Oh a good photo disaster!? A friend of mine not too long ago took a picture of me where I look like I am seizing…or “ceasuring” as our young curly headed friend had texted me. It is pretty scary! But the worst, I think, was a picture of me in a dance costume…not a pose…a shot caught right in the middle of the dance. I couldn’t believe the shot was captured as fast as the dance was. I had my leg up in an extension. It could have been a really good picture. The bad part was the angle the picture was taken and the view anyone who the saw the picture got. It was embarrassing to me…not that is was gross…just not a picture I would want to share with the town. The picture was taken about two years ago, but I hadn’t seen it until one day a couple of months ago (apparently the decorators are a little behind). I was walking into the Community Center and saw it displayed on the giant bulletin board that is hanging on the wall as you enter the building. I was mortified. I thought maybe nobody else would notice it. I mean, obviously the lady who put it up didn’t see anything wrong with it. In that day I had two other people I work with bring it up and ask me if I was ok with it being there. Needless to say, that picture didn’t stay up very long! Photoshop could not have made that photo any better!

  3. Samudra says:

    Actually, if the viewer knew this picture was taken in Turkey, he or she might think that Snickers bar was a bit of kafta that your father was eating in a rude way.

  4. Thea says:

    Kippy, shhhhh! I’m hoping no one will make the connection yet…

  5. Thea says:

    Not even a candy bar, Slarty? Or would it have taken on an even more diabolical meaning?
    I’ll bet the picture isn’t as bad as you think. You are incapable of taking a bad picture. I should know. I photoshopped you into a hairy man with an upside down head and you were still cute. Remember?

  6. Thea says:

    Okay, Samudra . . . now I’m hungry . . .

  7. Slarty says:

    Uh…candy bar? That might cause some confusion…

    And yes, I remember the picture…not remembering the cute part. I looked like the bride of Sasquatch. Aww. That picture is gone isn’t it :(?

  8. Thea says:

    Slarty, I thought I emailed it to you. It might be hidden in your computer.

  9. Slarty says:

    Haha!!!! I found it! I had saved the e-mail! Guess what the subject line was…Sasquatch.

  10. Kipper says:

    Auntie Thea? Did Slarty think I was cute?

  11. Elmo says:

    Hi! My Auntie Thea won some cookies. I don’t know what kind to bake for her, though.

  12. Thea says:

    Slarty, email it back to me, please?… in case I don’t have it.

  13. Thea says:

    Ooo, Kipper… you need to ask her yourself…
    But just between you and me, she thinks you’re very cute.

  14. Thea says:

    Hi, Elmo! Just bake YOUR favorite cookies for me, and I will LOVE them! I like anything that contains at least one of my two favorite food groups – sugar and bacon.
    (Sugar and Bacon sounds like a singing group from the 70’s, doesn’t it? A black diva and her white husband from southern Georgia… Wait a minute… Would that even happen?)

  15. Kippy says:

    ME!!!!!

  16. Elmo says:

    I don’t think there is such a thing as bacon chips. I’ll have to ask Mammy to find them at the grocery store. Wait! There is a World Market in Bozeman. Maybe they would have them? There were pictures sent to my Daddy the other day, pictures of Walmart in China. They had some creepy animal things for sell. I bet they have bacon chips! Oinker Chip Cookies. Does that sound like a good name? Or Porky Chip Cookies? I like that. I have a bear named chip. He’s really fat. Mammy sent you a picture of me and him. I really love cookies!

  17. Thea says:

    Yes, Kippy! :)

  18. Snuffygump says:

    Google Sugar and Bacon, groups of the 70’s and you might be surprised.

  19. Thea says:

    That’s okay, Elmo. We can skip the Porky chips :) Just as long as the cookies you bake are sweet, then I’m happy.
    Though… there are baco’s….
    No. Nevermind I said that.
    We’ll go with any kind of cookie that has sugar in it. :D

  20. Elmo says:

    Yeah! Bacon bits, bacos and those little dog treats Bacon Bacon. We have a bag of those right now for our neighbors little dog. Those could work!

  21. Thea says:

    That’s okay Elmo! Maybe I’ll have a cookie with chocolate in it instead. :)

  22. Slarty says:

    Hi Kippy! Your Auntie Thea was right. I did think you were cute!

  23. Elmo says:

    Are you sure, Auntie Thea? My Mammy and me, we can make them! My Mammy says they used to put bacon grease in the cornbread. But, I guess if you would really, really, really like chocolate much better, gooder, I can do that!

  24. Thea says:

    I’m sure Elmo! I heard from your Mammy that you are an expert on making cookies, especially cookies with chocolate in them. :D

  25. Elmo says:

    OK. I can make chocolate chip cookies. I can make Congo cookies. I can make M&M cookies. I can make Cavity cookies. I can make an oatmeal chocolate chip cookie, I can make a peanut butter chip cookie with chocolate chips in it too. I make brownies. I can’t remember anymore. Sometimes my mammy will make cookie dough and roll it into a long snake and put it in a freezer baggy and put it in the freezer. She says I’m not supposed to look at the cookie dough in the freezer. She is afraid that she will find me frozen in there later and that would make her cry. I want to be good so that I can have a cookie.

  26. Thea says:

    Wow, Elmo, all those cookies sound good!

  27. Elmo says:

    Are you coming soon?

  28. Purplume says:

    I enjoyed that video – Batman dog – terrific.

    Wow, I guess photoshop still can be a lot of work.
    I’d like just about every picture ever taken of me to be fixed up.

  29. Elmo says:

    O.K. I’ll make all of them for my Aumtie Thea!!!!!!

  30. Purplume says:

    I posted on this a while ago. It didn’t show up. Will this post?

  31. Thea says:

    Yep, both came up. :)
    I think I figured it out, Purplume. This site has a longer ‘approval pending’ period than the other site. On my old site, it would wait for a very short time for my approval before doing an automatic one. This one waits a bit longer for me to get on site and approve it before it does it for me. I THINK that is what is going on.
    Yeah… I wish I still had my photoshop program because there’s alot of old pic’s of me that I would like to clean up. Unfortunately, they’ve gone all spotty. I also wish I had a hair-fixer program where I could re-do my hairstyles in my current shots. I had better hair when I was younger, but now, it’s just messy.

  32. Thea says:

    Sort of soon, Elmo! But until I come, we can chat on the blog :)

  33. Elmo says:

    How long is sorta soon? I’m really excited!!! Should me and Mammy start to bake now? We have to make a nest for you and Uncle Randy! Mammy will let me watch for you out on the front porch. She won’t let me wait and watch for you outside by the curb. She’s afraid someone will take me and she’ll never see me again and that will make her cry! There are tomato plants on the front porch. I could climb one of those so that I can watch for you more better gooder!

  34. Kippy says:

    Really, Miss Slarty? Did you think that I was even cuter than Felix or Winnie? Their my brothers, you know! Did your Mammy really name you Slarty? My name is Kippy. My Mammy named me that. Not really, she named me Kip, but I answer to Kippy and the Kipper. Sometimes though, my Mammy and Daddy make up a song around my name and they make words rhyme with Kippy and I don’t like what they rhyme. The song can have a different tune each time, but it’s always the same insulting rhyming words to Kippy, Kip Or Kipper. I thought of changing my name, but they would just make up another song. They are just too clever, so it’s no use.

  35. Thea says:

    Slarty? You hear that? You have a question to answer… :)

  36. Thea says:

    Elmo, maybe you’d better wait until we get on the plane before you start baking the cookies. I’ll call you when we’re getting ready to come. How’s that? But it won’t be until May when we pack and come see you. Be careful and don’t fall off a tomato plant! I don’t want you to fall on your cute bulby nose and get hurt!

  37. Slarty says:

    Yes, Kippy! Now, I wouldn’t want to hurt Felix and Winnie’s feelings by saying you are the cutest, but between you and me I do think you are……………very cute.

    Actually, Auntie Thea nicknamed me Slarty….Slarty Cheeks. She comes up with some good ones! You’ll have to ask your Mammy what my real name is. I like your name, Kippy. Where I live a lot of the license plate letters are arranged KPY, and I always think of you when I see one. I even took a picture once to show Auntie Thea. What are the rhymes? Surely they aren’t too bad. Of course, I wouldn’t want any songs made with Slarty rhymes! Well, if you ever change your mind about a name change I know a good lawyer who would do it for a decent price. But you are probably right. Your Mammy and Daddy would probably just come up with a silly song for any name you have.

  38. Kippy says:

    Auntie Thea!!!!! I was writing a note to Miss Slarty and it dissaperared! I wasn’t done with it!! Did you find it? I was starting to tell her that I would look for her name on a license tag up here and it flew away! I was gonna tell her there are 3 Mini Coopers that live here in Anaconda. I guess she’ll see this and know that…but she won’t know what else I wrote! Maybe your blog site sucked it into the comment bin anyway. I didn’t tell it to, though! Now I’m really, really worried!

  39. Elmo says:

    Auntie Thea? Are your feet OK? Did Uncle Randy get the watermelons off? How far is it til May? My Daddy’s tomatos are all green. He’s worried that they won’t turn red.

  40. Snuffygump says:

    Since I have been scanning a ton of old pictures as of late, I ran across a definate ‘picture gone bad’. I pretty much have always been shocked when any picture of myself does turn out well. some people are so photogenic! I am not.
    Out of all of our 300 some odd wedding photos, I can say that there were a couple that I should have tossed, but having been raised to always respond to my mother’s voice in my head, ‘Don’t throw that away! You might need it later! You can use that for something! Think of all of the starving children in Africa! It might be an antique somday or my fathers contribution to the guilt line, ‘You can build a bird house out of that!’ I put those two bad photos in with the rest of the lineup. I’m sending it to you, Auntie Thea……Thea, via email. Will you hear the bellow of a cow, as I did?

  41. Thea says:

    Elmo, I’m sure everything will be okay :)

  42. Thea says:

    Snuffygump… that must have been some spectacularly delicious cake! When I saw the wedding photo and read your single-word commentary of ‘Moo!’ I thought I was going to bust a gut.
    Oh, how I WISH I could share that picture with readers…!
    Perfect!

  43. Thea says:

    Kippy, I am so sorry about your lost comment. I looked in the comment bin and it’s not there. Maybe since you only have one finger on each hand, you accidentally hit the wrong button and deleted it. But if you got your Mammy to type it for you, it was just one of those accidents that happen when working with computers. I’m sure Slarty will read what you wrote and know what you wanted to say. Maybe you can write her another message?

  44. Snuffygump says:

    When you do a blog on Cakes Gone Bad, I will send my entry in on that one! The cake was inedible. I had 3 friends who all wanted to help with the wedding. All 3 are superb cooks. Putting 3 fabulous cooks together in one kitchen served to prove the old adage that too many cooks spoil the pot. They were laughing and carrying on, but wouldn’t let me enter the kitchen when I wanted to investigate the reason for hearing the garbage disposal running constantly. How could we know the end result until after the cake was cut? They forgot the most major ingredient, a raspberry soaking syrup. I can’t even describe what the cake tasted like, but if there had been a room full of cats at our wedding, they would have all been busy scratching, trying to cover over the cake. Fortunately, another friend, who is a published cook (featured in major cooking mags) had brought several cakes and I had also made some different cakes. NO ONE would touch that cake.

  45. Kippy says:

    Auntie Thea!!!! I don’t have one finger!!!!! My Mammy calls my paws, rosebuds, like in they look like rosebuds!!!!!!!!! I was trying to tell Miss Slarty that I’m too embarrassed to tell her what the rhymes are that my Mammy and Daddy make up for my name and then I forgot everything else that I wrote and Miss Slarty is going to think I’m just a loser!!! I ‘m going to go somewhere and just hide.

  46. Slarty says:

    Uh-oh Kippy! What else did you write? I would like to hear. You live in Anaconda?

    Haha the first time I ever heard Mini Cooper (I won’t say how old I was) I thought it was some girls name hahahahaha. That was an embarrassing moment.

  47. Kippy says:

    I don’t remember. I got so very upsetted that now I forgot. I live in Anaconda, Montana with my Mammy, my Daddy and my 7 brothers and one sister. There’s no snakes here though. We have lived here for 13 years now and my Mammy and Daddy just saw their first snake here. It was a little bitty stripey snake. He was dead though and dried upped. The high school mascot is a Copperhead. They don’t have those up here either. They just thought that up because copper mining and smelting is how everyone made their living, back in the day. I like snakes OK, but I like squirrels more better. And I really like toys!

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