No. Not the man in the picture up above. That is my dad. On a date with my mom. They’re trying to impress each other. It must have worked. I was born four years later.
No . . . This is my Man of Mystery: In April of this year I had a new reader join my blog, leaving some of the most unique comments. Any of you who have read the comments following my blogs might remember some of the exchanges. In the beginning, we knew only his name: Kippy. Then after my blog, DROOL CATCHERS, we learned that Kippy, who told me that he is 27 years old and still lives at home, does not have teeth.
For many, this tidbit from Kippy might evoke the image of a mountain cabin next to a coal mine, but, as we were to find out, they would be wrong. Kippy hails from Montana, where he lives with his Mammy, Daddy, 7 brothers, and one sister. I know. . . For many the image of a mountain cabin next to a coal mine fades, only to be replaced with the sound of dueling banjos.
And then, bit by bit, he told us a little about his siblings . . .
After my blog, VOLLEYBALL & MSG, we learned that he has a brother named Bud. Bud, it seems, gets strapped to the front of the family kayak with bungee cords when their parents go kayaking, making a unique hood ornament . . . (According to Kippy, the cords stop his brother Bud from falling in and drowning.) Then, after the blog, I AM IN BIMBO-LIMBO, we learned that he has a little brother, Elmo. Elmo, it seems, is afraid of pelicans because, in the words of Kippy, “Elmo is afraid they are going to get him, cause our Daddy has him believing that pelicans are that powerful. Elmo is such a little guy and our Daddy has him convinced that he would be a tasty morsel to any pelicans palate.”
Kippy, it seems, is very protective of his little brother Elmo. We find this out after I wrote DARK HUMOR. I had included a link of ‘Tickle Me Elmo’ on fire, giggling and slapping his thigh. Kippy wrote: “What if my little brother sees that laughing Elmo video? How are you going to explain that one to him?”
Then, after IT’S GETTING CLOSER, many began to consider calling Social Services (even though Kippy is 27 years old) when he told us an even more revealing tidbit about his family life: “My Mammy and Daddy . . . are so easily entertained! Me and my brothers oughta know! Sometimes to entertain themselves, they used to lay on the bed and toss us up in the air and they would try to hit the ceiling with us. When we’d hit it, it was just soooo funny to THEM! Sometimes they would miss catching us when we were coming back down and we would land on the floor. That would make them laugh that much harder. Well, they don’t do that anymore, anyway. But meanwhile, me and my brothers all suffer….we’re just treated like a bunch of rag dolls!!!! My Mammy named me Kip, but I answer to Kippy and the Kipper. Sometimes though, my Mammy and Daddy make up a song around my name and they make words rhyme with Kippy and I don’t like what they rhyme. The song can have a different tune each time, but it’s always the same insulting rhyming words to Kippy, Kip Or Kipper. I thought of changing my name, but they would just make up another song. They are just too clever, so it’s no use.”
It is time for my readers to meet Kippy, the toothless 27-year-old with unusual parents.
Here he is, going sledding with his little brother Elmo:
Driving his red convertible . . .
. . . Right before his tragic accident . . .
But this is my absolute favorite picture . . . Kippy and his brother Felix drying off after their bath:
It is now time to meet his brother Felix. Felix asked that I introduce him in this way . . .
And SEXY . . .
And last, but not least, here is Elmo again, who is going to bake cookies for me when I come visit next year.
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‘And now for something completely different’ – click on the links below for your laugh of the day and watch with the sound up: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rb8aOzy9t4&NR=1